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Hello all,

before I start, this story is true.

lets just say Jack is married to Amy. and lets also say that Amy's sister was in a dublin hotel yesterday evening at a work function and she saw her sisters husband's mother with another man!

she told her sister about her wonderful MIL. What does she do. does she tell her husband or does she leave it?

it's a toughie because nobody wants to keep secrets from their Hubbie but how do you tell him something like that. then he knows your sister knows etc.

Any advice?

Do you know for sure that there was something more to it than just meeting a friend?

My opinion - I would tell him. He's your husband and I think would expect you to tell him seeing as you know. Find out from your sister how "together" she was with this other man! Maybe talk to her together and just mention in passing that your sister was at the function and saw her there. Shit shit shit...why does life have to be so bloody mixed up....i really feel for you and hubby as this is hard on both of you too.

Good luck girl!!

yeah i think you would need to be sure for sure, if i was 100% sure i would tell my husband and i would leave it to him to decide what he wanted to do about confronting her

I'd leave it and forget about it, it's third hand information, and you don't really know who the man was or why they were meeting. It could be completely innocent?

Maybe she could mention it casually to her MIL that her sister thought she saw her in town and see what the reaction is from there.

look, I was trying to do the 'this happened to my friend' thing. but my sister was in a hotel last night and she saw my other halfs mother with another man. they weren't kissing or anything like that, they were having a drink. thing is she recognised the man as a man from the local GAA. fair enough you might add. however two years ago I fell out with a friend who told me she'd seen my MIL snogging this man n question. what the heck do I do.

maybe the first story was a mistake and coupled with the incident last night has made it look worse or maybe she's seeing him..

I hate not being able to tell him.

Be very very sure. Only you can ever know how Hubby would react.

He would go nuts. absolutely nuts. he gets very angry about those sort of things. I have noticed though that she does go out with 'friends' a couple of times a week. If I told hubbie that i saw her then maybe it would be ok between us but he would be humiliated if he knew my sister told me.

if i were Amy i would say to MIL, oh my sis said she saw you in hotel. she was going to go to say hello, but realised you were with a man she didn't recognise and didn't want to interrupt you.

see what she says to that

no point upsetting Hubby, you could play innocent, if something needs to be told, wait until you know for sure

That happened to a friends cousins sister-in-law of my nephew's mother...terrible stuff

Maybe your MIL and her husband have an open relationship? Not too unheard of in this day and age. Maybe they're both open to meeting other people but want to keep it private from their kids. I wouldn't say anything. If there really was anything going on or if she really wanted 'it' to be a secret, don't you think that she would be a bit more discreet and not sitting in a hotel for all in sundry to see. The world is a very small place. The last thing you want to do is get on the wrong side of MIL!!!!

too true Sniggywig.. I'm glad i don't have the full facts because I can find the happy place in denial. If I had hard facts I'd probably be out of my mind at the mo!

No I just couldn't understand the point or it's relevance. that does not constitute starting on someone.