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Who comes to Hen (Family Wise?) In Laws?

 
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scposie
Mini Wolly


Joined: 17 Feb 2022
Posts: 239
Location: Limerick

Posted: Wed Nov 08, 2021 1:53 am    Post subject: Who comes to Hen (Family Wise?) In Laws?

Have I offended my MIL?
We laid down the law last night with BM (SIL to be) that Aunt's were not coming.
We did offer 2 friends of MIL if she wanted as I get on with them (dont get me wrong I get on with Aunts in law too) but I didnt want to invite some of my aunts so I would have hurt my mam's feelings.
I have never been on a hen where the mothers come too.
Feel kinda railroaded into it but they are coming now so thats that.
Being kinda railroaded into a lot about this wedding but how as ever.
She IM'd me tonight to say BM told her the Aunt wasnt invited so not to ask MIL's 2 friends cause would ony hurt the aunt.
Am ... My mothers friends were not even being asked either or my sister so really so should I feel bad?
Its just the way she typed it. We had mentioned hen infront of her before and she automatically added in her sisters... Confused? Me too.
I just wanted it to be BM, Friends and me.
Now ist Mother in law, my mother, BM, BM's friend, Brothers fiance, a cousin and then my friends. uh brother!
<me

But the weekend sounds good.
Spa weekend at Falls hotel in Ennistymon, Co. Clare.

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Shelly

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sonjawalsh
Major Wolly


Joined: 07 Aug 2022
Posts: 690
Location: the deise

Posted: Wed Nov 08, 2021 1:54 am    Post subject:

i suppose you can invite whoever you want. im letting anyone come who wants to. it should be good crack. nut do what you think is right for you

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scposie
Mini Wolly


Joined: 17 Feb 2022
Posts: 239
Location: Limerick

Posted: Wed Nov 08, 2021 2:01 am    Post subject:

yeah might be a slight over reaction on my part but I feel like I have no control over this wedding at all.

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Shelly

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MRS Mad Woman
Ultimate Wolly


Joined: 15 Nov 2021
Posts: 10869
Location: UNDER THE XMAS TREE WAITING ON SANTA BABY..

Posted: Wed Nov 08, 2021 9:59 am    Post subject:

you need to put the foot down NOW!

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Sz
Mini Wolly


Joined: 27 Feb 2022
Posts: 326

Posted: Wed Nov 08, 2021 10:04 am    Post subject:

You really should take control of your hen/wedding. My CBM asked me who I wanted to come on my hen. I sat down, wrote a list of who I wanted to be there and handed it to her. I didn't discuss it with anyone else, it's my hen so I decide!

There are 7 of my close friends, 2 cousins and 2 sisters. Thats it.

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curlymaid
New Wolly


Joined: 07 Nov 2021
Posts: 7

Posted: Wed Nov 08, 2021 10:49 am    Post subject:

Hi scposie, you should invite whoever you want, its your hen party and
if you don't it will just put a dampner on things.

I sent a text to all my inlaws yesterday to see if they wanted to go
to mine. My SIL text back to say she would come and her 17 year old
daughter. I text back saying it was adults only and then she told me
she wasn't going. I was fuming. I don't want my H2B niece at my
hen party and having to worry if we're going to get into pubs & clubs.

My H2B said I'm not to bother even asking her again to just leave if.
To be honest I'm glad she's not going, just causes a bit of friction.
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PinkLady07
Mini Wolly


Joined: 13 Jun 2022
Posts: 208
Location: Northsider

Posted: Wed Nov 08, 2021 12:43 pm    Post subject:

I know how you's feel with the inlaw thing, I've organising the hen weekend with my CBM and I haven't mentioned anything to my own mam or my MIL, it's a weekend away where I want to go mad and get drunk and not have them frowning at me.. I know they are both going to be offended that I haven't asked them but I am going to organise a night out and a meal nearer home and nearer to the time that should include Mammy's and Aunties and that!!
Did those of you who are married bring the Mammies on ur hens? Am I a selfish cow? It's just that my mam doesn't drink and she is very old fashioned so she wouldn't approve of me dressed as a school girl, sliding down a pole with a vodka in each hand!

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scposie
Mini Wolly


Joined: 17 Feb 2022
Posts: 239
Location: Limerick

Posted: Wed Nov 08, 2021 12:44 pm    Post subject:

Yeah my mam just asked me to ask my sister even though I had to ask her not to be my bridesmaid anymore cause her living in uk wasnt helping me and when in ireland couldnt make efforts to get to shops with us dress hunting.
I asked her and she said she will try but I know she wont be able to afford or leave her 3 kids, she will want to bring them! LOL
C'est La Vie!

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Shelly

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