WeddingsOnline.ie

Hiya girls.

Bit of background first.....
My sister was stopped by the gardai 2 weekends ago and breathalysed (she was grand) and I've heard so much about friends of friends being stopped etc etc. Since then I've been doubly careful about driving the morning after a night out (basically if I have to drive early in the morning, I'll only have a couple of drinks and finish the night on soda and lime or something).

It's h2b's stag this weekend and for some reason or other his lift will no longer be coming back on Sunday so h2b now plans on driving himself.
Anyway, as this town is only about an hour & a half away I have asked h2b if he wud still travel 2 d stag as planned (this evening after work) and I'll collect him on Sunday.

Well I swear to god, he's reacted like I'm there 2 spy on him or something. He spent half last night ranting & raving at me, and today won't answer the phone, reply to my texts or anything.

Maybe some people would say I should just butt out and let him take care of himself, but I just can't help feeling like I'm being penalised for being a concerned future wife. I mean, he'll be drinking A LOT over the next couple of days, & his job demands that he drive a lot.

Am I really being THAT unreasonable?

nope...

but i can see his point of view too...maybe he thinks you're being a bit mothery..

can you not arrange for someone else to bring him home? how are the other lads getting back?

xx

Eh no you are not he's being a total gobshite - sorry no offense intended!!! I think you are right to say it to him about the lift, God my wonderful hubbie collects me anythime he can & it's great as neither of us will drink & drive. Bloody MEN! I swear to God they'd drive you mad some times.

Well that's the bit that gets me - he'll be driving them!!!

OK, well there's only 2 plus h2b going for the weekend from our town. I've even suggested he come as far as Cork City with those who "get off" there and I'd collect him from Cork - but even that's not acceptable to him. MEN!?!? F^cking hell, I really wonder why I bother.......

I don't think you're being unreasonable - I think that if I offered to drive an hour an and a half to pick up H2B, he'd be delighted that he could sleep in the back of the car while I'm driving.

I can also his point (a little) though - imagine him telling the lads on his stag that you are driving down to pick him up the day after - he'll get the p*ss taken out of him no end - the usual "ball and chain" and "under the thumb" comments and "sure you aren't even married yet and she's checking up on you".

It's probably more this side of things he's thinking about rather than the offer of a lift and a snooze on the way home...

Maybe. He could try saying "god the lads would take the piss out of me" rather than "you're having nothing to do with this weekend. You stay out of it. I'll do what I want, when I want, and I'll do it my way".....

Laughing cos men are just so crap at communicating!!

They don't think about how bset to say something, they just say the first thing that comes into their heads that will have an impact... (need rolling eyes here!)

Maybe try telling him that after having thought about it, you understand why he might not have been pleased for you to pick him up, but that there ARE better ways of him telling you this, after all you were acting out of concern and worry for him, driving after being on the mega-beer!

A simple "Thanks but no thanks" would have sufficed...

Oops - double post

My God!! My DH always collects me after a night out and he would be thrilled for me to do the same - no questions asked and no accusations.
I think he's being very immature - feck him them if he doesn't want a lift.

I've only just thought that way about it Sweetcan. He does always collect me after a night out (he has to - I wouldn't get a taxi that far out in the country on my own, even if it was a free ride) but y'know funnily enough he doesn't like me collecting him. He always insists on taking a taxi....

god I'm just having the most horrible thought right now. I really shouldn't allow my mind to work like that - not with him being away all weekend....

So.....erm.....(change the subject, change the subject....).....think I'll pop over to one of the other forums and discuss....I don't know....NCTs or something.......anything to distract me.

I think you are right, its only natural to worry
about it. My friend was going to get everyone to
drive to her hen, 4 hours away which means
an early start the sun after to drive home, first
thing i thought of was the guards breathalysing
and everyone too tired to drive! so she arranged a
bus.

Well it's the sensible thing to do!!!

I think fellas leave their cop on behind when it comes to doing stuff with their mates. He'd rather act the hard man and risk losing his licence than appear to be under the thumb. Course I don't know why I expect him to grow up just coz he's getting married!!!! More fool me, eh..............

Tell him - "that's fine, be an ass ... when you loose your licence, don't bother your arse looking for a lift from me - you can get on your bike mate! "

I can understand completely why you're worried ... my fella wouldn't go out on the beer on the Sunday of the last bank holiday weekend because we were helping out someone move house so there was a lot of driving involved, and if he lost his licence, it basically means loosing his job as well.

What man likes being told what to do?
He thinks you are trying to spy on him how ridiculous is that and im sure its the last thing on your mind.You are just concerned about him.
He is completely over reacting but if he doesnt see your point then let him at it...these days no-one can take changes its far too dangerous.
Try again and make him listen to your point of view

What you're trying to do makes perfect sense to me, but then again I'm a woman and I use my brain
I'm sure he'll calm down and see the sense in what you're suggesting soon and if he doesn't - well at the very least he owes you an apology.