Moving in with your other half is not just a major physical and financial step but a major emotional step too. Uprooting your single life as you knew it and adjusting to life with your partner is exciting for most but for some it can also be quite daunting. For those who are finding it a little taxing we�ve put together a few basic tips and tricks to make the big move a smooth one... By Karen Birney
Bills, bills, bills
First thing’s first; finances, yes I know nobody wants to hear about ESB and NTL and phones and broadband and that fine you got when he decided he didn’t need to put a sticker on the bins because there was ‘hardly anything in them’, but it’s pretty important to sort this stuff out from the get-go. Be warned, fiscal matters can cause rifts that appear as if from nowhere -take for example if one person is doing the earning and the other is doing the spending. Decide how you will be splitting the bills before you move in, I suggest 50:50 however this will change from couple to couple for obvious reasons. A lot of couples have gone through big changes in their lives over the past year and you can be certain that financial dynamics will change within your relationship as the years go by. Being honest and supportive with each other when it comes to money matters will make your life much easier together.
Laying the ground rules
Hopefully before moving in together you’ll have a good idea of each others’ mannerisms and ideals (after all that’s why your compatible right?!) but it’s inevitable that certain things you do will become bigger and more grating as time goes by. You both need to find a point where you can be honest with each other but not overwhelming. Set down some ground rules before things get out of hand. For example he may be used to having his friends over every Thursday for poker until three in the morning, or you may be used to having the girls over for a tap dancing class around the same time as Soccer Saturday is on, find a way to compromise with each other.
It’s all about me
He has a lot more stuff than you thought right? I bet you thought he wore the same jeans all the time??? And the same runners??? Well no, he actually has eight pairs of each! And that games collection takes up more space than you imagined too eh? Maybe you won’t have the fitted wardrobe to yourself like you though you would? Maybe Karen Millen will have to hang next to Carragher 23? Maybe there are worse things in the world than adapting your overtly girly style to mesh with some of his favourite things? Saying that, if he really loved you he’d throw out that Stop sign he and the lads stole on the ‘Funniest Night Ever’ without hesitation.
Keep the flame
Routine, what a beautiful word, routine... This tip is one most ladies have the most trouble with. We are creatures of habit, we love our comforts... and we love nothing more than coming home from work on a particularly drizzly day (aka every day) and snuggling up with our partners on the couch with a pot of tea and a QI marathon. ‘Was that the phone?’ ‘Yea, the girls are heading to the cinema.’ ‘You gonna go?’ ‘Nah, too cold out...’ Sound familiar? If it does then listen up cause right now you’re heading for an eternity of ‘rut’.
It’s so important when you move in together to do your best not to get into this situation seven nights a week, and it’s easier said than done. Get out with your friends once a week, or once a fortnight even, even just for a coffee and a catch up in their kitchen; don’t cut yourself off from the world because you’ve nabbed a good’un. And, equally important, remember that you are a couple, and to keep your romantic side alive. When you’re stuck in the tired routine of lazing on front of the TV before bed time the dating aspect falls by the waistline...the excitement of going out with your other half, getting all dressed up beforehand and trying to impress each other is integral in maintaining a healthy relationship.
Don’t sweat the small stuff
Long showers, wet towels, bed sheets in strange tucked-in position, this is what we call the ‘small stuff’. Yes it can be annoying that he has a habit of taking the washing out of the machine and leaving it on the floor but all the clothes he’s to step over after you’ve bombed the wardrobe looking for your petrol blue tulip skirt can’t be his favourite thing in the world. You both know what is exemptible and what is a health and safety violation of the highest order, out with your pet peeves once or twice and then bite your tongue. Failing that call in the How Clean is your House girls but remember, you’ll have to look at them without asking them how they haven’t yet lost the will to live.
The 10 best parts of living together:
1. Cooking saucy meals together in the evening
2. Going to bed together and waking up together
3. Sharing music, dvds, books etc...
4. Coming home to each other after a long cold day
5. Kisses and cuddles on tap!
6. Sharing the boring household chores
7. Not having to take out the bins anymore!
8. Lazy weekends in
9. Not being scared at night
10. Getting to share all your happy moments together
By Karen Birney
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