My Mother is driving me nuts

ReginaFalange · by **ReginaFalange** » Tue May 01, 2022 4:37 pm

Honestly I have to count to ten in my head every time I have a conversation with her recently. I can't mention ANYTHING about how I do things with my son without her pointing out what I'm doing wrong and how I should be doing it. I wouldn't mind only it's all very much outdated advice which is now frowned upon (e.g. sleeping on side etc..)
Today's conversation:
"He should be sleeping for 20 hours a day"...erm no not anymore, he's nearly 3 months old so will have more alert time during the day.
"Put him on his side to sleep- it never did any of ye any harm"
"Is he still in your bedroom- oh you're going to regret that"
"why don;t you give him some honey on his soother" - WTF giving honey to an 11 week old??

I could go on!!

Sorry- no point to this thread really- just wanted to vent.

Feel free to add your own gripes.....

mammymcphee · by **mammymcphee** » Tue May 01, 2022 4:40 pm

my mam is driving me nuts too, Im off sick with a cold and sore throat, and she rang yesterday asking me why i didnt go to work, ah i said, im not feeling well, she was giving out saying, oh you will lose that job!! O:|

woman!!

(im there 11 years and rarely out sick in fairness to me)
poor dad came on the phone full of sympathy then!! and he only out of hospital!

she rang me today and i didnt answer! :-8

rant over! :o0

ciaraella · by **ciaraella** » Tue May 01, 2022 4:41 pm

Funnily enough it was my Dad and father-in-law that drove me nuts when DD was smaller!
'Mind her head, she's too warm/too cold, she's going to roll off that bed (DD could barely open her eyes never mind roll

), she might have a pain, she's hungry etc' -
they were utter panics!
They've calmed down a bit now, i just used to say 'ah no she's grand' to everything and try and ignore them, easier said than done i know >:o(

FastLane · by **FastLane** » Tue May 01, 2022 4:46 pm

My poor Mam is driving me up the wall too.. she doesn't know what to do/say to me at the minute (I've moved home after a recent break up). I know she's trying but keeps chatting to me about stupid stuff that I couldn't give a sh!te about at the moment - e.g. Jeez I didn't realise Davina McCall was married with 3 children... Imagine, Pat from the Voice didn't even fill in his application form his girlfriend did... have you ever tried 'some random supplement' pet? and on, and on, and on..
And I know I'm a misery at the moment but if I cry or get upset she just keeps saying "Ah stop pet, you're only upsetting yourself".. ah NO I'm just upset, I can't help it!! I think she thinks that if she acts as if I'm home on holidays we won't have to talk about it, and if I try, she immediately changes the subject/leaves the room/starts praying!! Counting to 10... I miss my own house! :o(

ReginaFalange · by **ReginaFalange** » Tue May 01, 2022 4:48 pm

Glad I'm not the only one so!!

Oh the best one was this

Her: So what colour is his hair now
Me: Blonde-brown
Her: Ah it's not, it's red
Me: No it's not
Her: Oh just you wait and see....

FFS I look at him 24/7...she hasn't seen him since he was 3 weeks old (we don't live close) and it was never red!!!

ReginaFalange · by **ReginaFalange** » Tue May 01, 2022 4:49 pm

Sorry to hear about your break up Fastlane :xxx

FastLane · by **FastLane** » Tue May 01, 2022 5:02 pm

Thanks Regina, never thought I'd end up at home with my Mam and Dad again.. and DEFINITELY never thought it would be easier to talk to Dad about this stuff!! I know she'd do anything to help but all I want to do is talk to her.. I don't need a cup of tea/ to put my faith in the Lord/ to bring a hot water bottle to bed O:|

ciaraella · by **ciaraella** » Tue May 01, 2022 5:02 pm

FastLane wrote:And I know I'm a misery at the moment but if I cry or get upset she just keeps saying "Ah stop pet, you're only upsetting yourself".. ah NO I'm just upset, I can't help it!!(

There's nothing worse when you're upset, sometimes you need to have a good proper cry and people trying to stop you or trying to get you to cheer up can be awful.

Smileykaz · by **Smileykaz** » Tue May 01, 2022 5:07 pm

Sorry to hear about the break up Fast Lane. Not the same thing, but following a surgery in 2005 when I was very ill I moved back in with my folks and it took a lot of adjusting. Just not having your own space anymore, both physically and mentally. Take it easy, one step at a time. Maybe just say to your Mam out straight 'Mam, this prayer won't help me, I need to talk to you about it, will you please let me talk about it?' and see what happens? It might 'shock' her into staying quiet and listening?

Regina - I've no kids yet but I remember when all my nieces and nephews were born my Mam sometimes gave advice just for something to say! Even when she hadn't been asked for it. Like say my sister might say 'God little woman was up all night with the teeth' just in passing, jsut for conversation and my Mam would launch straight into 'did you try this? did you try that? What did you give her going to sleep?' all of that. And my sister wouldn't be looking for advice, she'd just be making conversation. But similarly so was my Mam, if you get me, it was just something to say. Was annoying though I'm sure for my sister to have to listen to it.

Would you try saying 'He's fine, everything's great!' whenever she asks after him, even if it's not? Even if you've been up all night, just fake it and say everything's grand, just to give yourself a break from the advice?

ReginaFalange · by **ReginaFalange** » Tue May 01, 2022 5:16 pm

I reckon that I'll be trying that from now on Kaz!

Mari yay · by **Mari yay** » Tue May 01, 2022 5:19 pm

My MIL is driving me cracked. We're an hour from the hospital for when baby arrives. So we will be staying home with my dad close to the due date. MIL actually asked my husband last week would he give her a lift to the hospital when the baby arrives! :o0

I just had to laugh she obviously thinks he'll have nothing better to do when his baby arrives!

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