Time Mag Article (a little NWS)

by **jamjars** » Fri May 11, 2022 12:12 pm

There's an article in the Time Magazine today about a woman still breastfeeding her 3 year old child, thoughts? Not sure how I feel about it...

I know the BF vs FF debate comes up a lot in M&K but it doesn't seem to be really discussed much here, I've always been of the opinion that I'd try BF and if it works for me great, if not I'll switch to FF though I know there's some pretty strong opinions on the both sides, which I guess I don't really understand. Surely it's just a personal preference?

Also, was a little surprised at the cover of Time Mag in relation to the article, it's quite evocative, but I guess the fact that it makes me uncomfortable means I must not be ok with a 3 year old still being BF!!

I've posted it here for everyone to see but don't mind taking it down if it bothers people.

Ellefun · by **Ellefun** » Fri May 11, 2022 1:04 pm

Breastfeeding shouldn't be a taboo... Personally I can't see myself breastfeeding any eventual children I might have, after the age of 1.. If I even BF at all, or for that long. I think after a certain age it stops being of any particular added health benefit and is more about contact for the mother. It's a type of dependence I wouldn't be keen on. I think it's natural for a child to grow and become more independent. If they want to BF for an extended time then so be it. But I'll be hoping to reach any milestones and celebrate their maturity... from cot to bed, breast to bottle/beaker, crawling to walking etc. No doubt there is a pang of sadness at each milestone as they grow but it's natural and nothing to be afraid of. It's not like once you stop BFing they move out!

Mari yay · by **Mari yay** » Fri May 11, 2022 1:13 pm

Each to their own if they choose to BF or FF, but this would unnerve me a little from the point of view that it kind of stops the kid being independent. At what stage does it become more of an attachment thing for the mother?
I could be way off, maybe it's great for the kid, I just fail to see how.

hestia · by **hestia** » Fri May 11, 2022 1:21 pm

Call me old-fashioned, but what bothers me is the photo. It's deliberately provocative and I don't think it is very respectful of his parents, or responsible of the publisher, to agree to publish it. He may not feel comfortable about it later.

In my opinionated opinion, parents do not have the right to expose anything they feel like about their children just because they happen to be the child's mother or father, or they wish to make a point with shock-value tactics. This goes for more than pictures in my personal opinion, I think every parent should consider carefully how they describe their children in public, how much private information they put out there, especially while the children are so young and are unable to make an "informed" decision themselves. Children have the same right to integrity as grown ups. It is the parent's job to make sure their children's integrity is protected and respected as much as possible - and to consider the long term effect of the decisions made on behalf of their children.

As for breastfeeding, I hear it's a controversial issue alright but I personally couldn't give a f*ck how long she chooses to feed her child.

by **2ndBaby** » Fri May 11, 2022 1:35 pm

I have no issue with BF, even though I FF both of mine. In fact, I take my hat off to any mother who can do it, as I know it can be an uphill battle for the first few weeks. I breastfed DS1 for a few days, but I just found it too much and switched to FF.

However I am extremely perturbed by the picture. If it was a baby in the picture I probably wouldn't bat an eyelid. But the sole purpose of this picture is meant to shock. I believe this mother is using this image to get some sort of fame, and it is grossly unfair to her son. It might not bother him now, but imagine how he might feel in a few years time, when he realizes that the image of him at his mothers breast went global. This is not years ago, where magazines were published and never seen again. With the internet, this image will be able to be viewed by the entire world, for years and years to come. How will he feel about this when he is a teenager?

I think this mother is an attention seeking wagon, who has used both her son and breastfeeding to further her own need for fame. She is incredibly selfish.

This is furthered by some comments she made in her Blog. Whereby she claims she breastfed her son in the playboy mansion, and I quote...... 'I've breastfed Aram at the Playboy mansion. I actually felt it was the most appropriate place on earth to do it.' (http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/artic ... son-4.html)

WTF????

by **2ndBaby** » Fri May 11, 2022 1:39 pm

DP sorry!

teapotty · by **teapotty** » Fri May 11, 2022 1:58 pm

She said she's still breasfeeding his 5 year old brother and that she herself was breastfed until she was 6. I can't put it into words what I find so weird about it. I think it's that they know what breasts and are and are at an age closer to knowing about the sexual side of life than the innocence of a baby. Does that make any sense at all?

I'm all for BF but not beyond the point where the child is old enough to ask for boob. I'm just uncomfortable with that.

ianstuart · by **ianstuart** » Fri May 11, 2022 2:31 pm

There is a time to end everything and BF children of 5 and 3 is a bit much. They are too old and i dont think they are getting any more nutrition from BF than they could get from a healthy portion of 5 a day.

NittyGritty · by **NittyGritty** » Fri May 11, 2022 3:22 pm

Tom Cruise, Nicole Kidman, foreplay. Image.

Ok, ok, I take it back. Very innappropriate.

Out of interest, for anyone who might know. Would you not run a serious risk of getting your nipples bitten when feeding a child that age? Like he has teeth. Or is that a really stupid question?

Apart from that I don't really care what other people decide to do with their kids and/or their breasts. But as someone else said, it's out of order publishing a picture of it. Imagine if his mates get a hold of that in 10 or 15 years. Christ, I'm blushing for him.

R2theB · by **R2theB** » Fri May 11, 2022 3:29 pm

teapotty wrote:I'm all for BF but not beyond the point where the child is old enough to ask for boob. I'm just uncomfortable with that.

+1, find it a bit unnerving. Which I understand is judgmental of me, as BF well into childhood is very common in other cultures so why is it something that upsets us here in the western world? That said, I wholeheartedly agree with other posters about the photo being unnecessarily evocative and unfair on the child, poor little fella. Cringing for his 14 yr old self.

rosie_mama · by **rosie_mama** » Mon May 14, 2022 7:56 am

It is the photo that I find disturbing, not the fact that he is being BF. My DS is almost 3, he was FF but does still have a dummy and a cup of milk at bedtime, and so I suppose in that way it is similar to still BF a 3 year old. It is familiar and comforting to them.

To me, BFing is all about nurturing, and this photo doesn't convey that at all. I'd be a lot less shocked by it if she was holding him in her arms, rather than have him standing up on a chair and her posing with her hand on her hip. I'd say that was intentional though for the publicity.

I do wonder about BFing a child older than this though, for the same reasons that I am now starting to wonder whether I should have DS1 in the bath / shower with me, as he is reaching the age where he will remember things and not sure he should remember that iykwim. And I do agree with the other comments on how the child himself will feel about this particular photo when he is older.

mrs mammy · by **mrs mammy** » Mon May 14, 2022 11:19 am

Out of interest, for anyone who might know. Would you not run a serious risk of getting your nipples bitten when feeding a child that age? Like he has teeth. Or is that a really stupid question?

That was one of my reasons for wanting to wean the lo's off, as soon as they got teeth. I wanted to bf for ds (now 3) until he was 6 months but it was 9 months when he was weaned off, no harm done but there were a few bites here and there. Earlier at 4 months for dd as I wasnt producing enough milk (too tired).
I was talking to a mom in the playground a few weeks back. Her lo is 3 and she was embarrassed to admit she is still bf on demand, day and night. She is having great difficulty weaning her off.

BusyDee · by **BusyDee** » Mon May 14, 2022 11:20 am

The 5 year old that she is also bfing - she adopted him from Ethopia in 2010! She said he may feed once a month.

She also said that she wouldn't feed him like that (standing on a chair) at home that it was only for the cover of the mag (obviously to create publicity etc)

Sorry but it always reminds me of "bitty" from Little Britain :o0

YoMammaSo · by **YoMammaSo** » Mon May 14, 2022 2:12 pm

I think that picture is disgusting IMO! It looks totally wrong to me!

ciaraella · by **ciaraella** » Mon May 14, 2022 2:16 pm

hestia wrote:Call me old-fashioned, but what bothers me is the photo. It's deliberately provocative and I don't think it is very respectful of his parents, or responsible of the publisher, to agree to publish it. He may not feel comfortable about it later.

+1, exploitation methinks! I wouldn't think the child will be glad to be known for it

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